What is cooking today?

So I waited as the cooker was letting out steam slowly. Very slowly. It has just started cooking. Atleast I think it is cooking. I verified the stove and it was on. Five minutes and I am still waiting. I heard someone saying that it might take a while, so let me say whats cooking. With Chini away in India enjoying mom made breakfast, lunch and dinner and fresh juices in between, I decided to take the bold step to cook; something I rarely do from the time Big bang happened. You know when the everything came out of nothing! Nothing related though.

Anyway, after making few attempts like chutneys and Chicken curries (see in Facebook ;) ), I decided on the ultimate dish of Mushroom biryani. As always, I thought it is going to an easy day.

The morning had started long before I woke up and I met it only around 11 AM. Chini has already called twice and it was time to begin the weekend now. So without much ado, i started to make preparations for biryani. Chini dictated the recipe in exact metric units. Similar to Parthiban questioning Vadivelu the value of “a punch”, I am always ridiculed by the measurement terms like “a pinch” or “little”. How much really is a pinch? is it 2 grams or 5 grams? Or does it depend upon the density of what we are measuring? And there is always a difference in the value of pinch based on who is taking it right. And what is the size of little? There is ‘little’ Stuart in the size of a mouse and he says he eats large Gold fish biscuit which if you ask me is “little”. Chini already annoyed with my questioning decided to make it simple. All measurements will always be in cups or teaspoons. (she confirmed i need to measure to the top flat level)

After getting the recipe from Chini, it is time to get all ingredients. She already informed me that Biryani masala powder is there in home and i just need to get Onions, tomato and mushrooms. I could use Sona Masoori rice instead of Basmati. But suddenly my stomach started to say something. I am Hungry and it is 12 PM already. So I decided to have lunch outside and then get the ingredients on the way. After much searching for a quick bite, I found the only food I have appetite for is Biryani. But that is not going to be ready for another 2 hours (if I start in the next 5 minutes). So I went to Rice ‘n’ Roti and got non vegetarian meals with Chicken biryani and “Mushroom” curry. Filled with heavy lunch, I then decided to take a rest.

Relaxed on the couch after watching Jim playing pranks on Dwight, I finally decided to get back to “Mushroom” biryani at around 3 PM. Cooker on the stove and ghee hot in it. I chopped the onions and started frying in the cooker. As soon as it turned Golden brown, I added the half tomato mixing it continuously to avoid sticking to the bottom. That is when I realized I need to search for masala powder. Going through the kitchen shelf, refrigerator and the oven, I found that I cannot find the powder which means that it isn’t there in home. You know what that means? It means it is NOT going to be an easy day.

Now is a hard choice to make. I either run to the grocery store and get the masala before the onion burns or I could throw away the onions and buy mushroom biryani from the restaurant near by. I could not take the second choice as I do not like that restaurant much. So switching off the stove, I drove fast to the grocery store and found biryani masala for 2 dollars. The problem now is the Indian grocery stores do not accept credit card for below 5 dollars purchase and unfortunately I did not have any cash. So I hunted for 3 dollars worth food and I found only the raw materials for making food. Another trouble. After searching all the aisles, I found Parampara, something much closer to finished food. Returning back to home, I continued the operation. After adding 4 teaspoons of Biryani masala powder and constant stirring, it started smelling good. It really is going to be good. Next ingredient on the line was 3 cups of water. My fear that if you think everything is going good, it means there is something wrong altogether just got real. I had used the small cooker of 3 liter size which will become full if I add 3 cups of water. Now I have to transfer all the contents from the small cooker to the larger cooker. Tired of making stupid mistakes, I did what I had to do.

Everything transferred, I then started washing rice. And that is when I realized that I could have bought basmati rice when I went to the grocery store. Biryani would be very tasty with basmati rice. And that is also when I realized I could have bought basmati rice for 3 dollars instead of Parampara mix. Thinking all that I could have done, I washed the available Sona Masoori rice and just when I was about it mix it, I found mushroom lying on the side - uncut, unwashed, uncooked and obviously un-mixed. Damn. And so the large cooker was put on low heat, and I started frying the mushrooms in the small cooker. After 15 minutes and 1 hour since I started cooking, I realized I am finally closer to finishing it. After multiple checks on the recipe and thinking many times on what more mistakes could be made in making of mushroom biryani, i finally added the rest of the ingredients including washed rice, fried mushrooms and 1 teaspoon of salt for taste. Everything added, I closed the lid and put on the whistle and I waited.

PS: By the time I finished writing this, the cooker has already made 5 whistles asking me to take it off the hot stove. Mushroom biryani is finally ready and is waiting for any volunteers to taste it.

PPS: After much contemplation and some encouragement from Chini, I took the task myself and tasted it.

PPPS: I did it. Mushroom biryani smells, feels and tastes like Mushroom biryani. seriously guys, It is real good and I am going to keep it all for myself.

Lets put a smile on that face

It surprises me to think that less than a millimeter thickness is all that is different between sharp and the blunt edge of a knife. In general, knife or a dagger is a beautiful invention of human kind. It acts as the creator as well as the destroyer depending upon who yields it. Even as a kid, I always like to play with knifes. A swift cut on the carrot slicing it neatly into two is a favorite pass time of mine. That is why I was a good kid always ready to help my mom in the kitchen with cutting and dicing the vegetables. And that is why my skills in cooking ends with cutting the vegetables. I am glad my mom restricted my chores to cutting only vegetables and fruits, for if I was given the honor to cutting the meat pieces as a kid, a slasher movie named “INJEY hostel” would be made will be a small exaggeration only.
A lover of Kill Bill, but calm at heart I channeled my cutting skills to aesthetic purposes like vegetable and fruit carving. I started creating wedged tomatoes and guavas, onion rings and served watermelon as balls instead of slices. The art of road side cucumber sellers in making flower style cuts on a single cucumber dividing them into two and each looking as if it is a whole cucumber astonished me greatly. Even if you call it as just cheating, I call it artfully cheating. And for the petty money they make, I do not complain them.
While my largest passion and career choice (computers) called for cut, copy and paste, I did not enjoy it as much as cutting vegetables (NOTE: I meant cut,copy and paste only). After landing in US, my eyes dropped on cutting only one object and every October I felt very close to reaching it. Unfortunately, my enthusiasm was not shared by others around me and I had to wait 3 years before getting the chance finally. And so this year, I finally bought my first pumpkin to carve. It was not without many hurdles and “NO” that I had to fight hard to get the small sized pumpkin. Chini’s argument was that it is a Christian festival. I went “huh?”. After heavy persuasive discussions and threatening that I will not eat pumpkin forever and finally after getting the support of Tommy boy’s girl (who was equally opposed by Tommy boy), I got the one that I was longing for a long time.
The day of carving did not come early though as the auspicious date and time to cut a pumpkin was not found in the calendar and we had to wait a week since getting the pumpkin. So it stood smiling for a week with sharp teeth and Rajini’s hair that I had drawn on it. And one good sunday, the time did come and with little help from youtube, we started to give new face for our orange friend. And it definitely was a wonderful experience right from cutting the scalp and scooping out of the juicy and sticky pulp inside. [Warning: Please do not imagine human head for a pumpkin. The things we are going to do will make you throw up.] When we could not clean the inside with the ice cream scoop which finally was broken by over-enthusiastic Tommy boy, we had to use the hands. This is where Chini did a wonderful job and cleaned all the long thin fibers sticking out of the inner wall. And Tom had cleaned it very much that it was as smooth as the inside of a skull.
With the pulp out, now it is time for serious carving. We did not have to sketch the eyes for our pumpkin as we had drawn it earlier. I pressed the knife edge over the left eye and pushed it slowly to keep the hole small. After three simple cuts, a triangular piece feel off from the face what was an eye before. More care was taken when removing the right eye as we did not want the pumpkin to end with squint eyes. This was more tough for tom, as they are carving the eyes for the first time. Coming down to the mouth which really is the toughest part of all as any mistake in that will make the pumpkin toothless. With multiple styles replaced we went for the regular 3 teeth on top and bottom and Chini took on the task as she considers teeth to be precious. Believe me when I say it for I try hard every day to find a way to escape from multi-time brushing of teeth daily. After long careful cuts and small adjustments on the left and right making the mouth wide more open than planned, the pumpkin was finally done.
We did wash it with water and polished its face with Crisco Vegetable oil. Imagining it now, it is like wiping the face with your own blood. I am feeling guilty for being so cruel. And finally to complete celebration, we lit up a candle inside and saw the bright light out of the open eyes and mouth and also the small nose we pierced in the end. And there it was. Our Pumpkin shining for the Halloween celebration boo-ing away the ghosts and burning more than we wanted as the candle fire ignited the oil lining on the inside of the pumpkin.